WHY BOTHER MEDITATING

It feels odd to write on a topic that so many others have addressed so well. Yet here I am offering my own perspective, as much for myself as for you who may be reading this.

In my essay, “Living Well in Two Dimensions”, I made the point that life is fullest, most intense and joyful in the present moment. It seems obvious to me that immersion in immediate experience through our body’s emotions and sensual potential is a powerful vehicle for being a part of the “now” moment. Yet, as powerful and meaningful as the physical connection to reality can be, there is another more powerful path to connection that opens the door to a far broader and deeper reality than can ever be known through the senses and emotions.

This is the path that opens the door to consciousness itself and the ecstasy of unitive experience. I realize that this sounds a bit esoteric and abstract, but those who have experienced it, find it to be the most transformative, freeing experience they have ever known. A surprisingly large number of people have had at least one such experience. One study I am aware of from the 1980’s found that in a general sample of American adults, approximately one third remembered at least one experience in which the boundaries between self, other and creation dissolved and they felt connected to a source of universal and unlimited love. Some said that their lives were changed forever by the experience. Others simply went on with their lives, but never forgot it. In my essay, “What is Enlightenment?” I describe one such experience in detail. What these experiences point out and what mystics of all religions and ages report is that there is a potential within the human mind to transcend our sense of being lonely, disconnected entities in what often feels to be an alien, hostile universe. They affirm that the meaning, joy and gratitude we feel when we experience a moment of profound connection with another person, or nature, or beloved pet is a minor manifestation of what is available to us when we learn to be fully in the moment and free of the artificial wall created by the Ego we assume ourselves to be.

Meditation can be used for many purposes such as relaxation, physical healing, internal self-exploration, and tapping into intuitive wisdom. At its most profound, however, it is simply a way of being as fully in the moment and as deeply real as possible. It is a systematic way of moving away from the time bound dramas of our lives, which we live on the stage of the horizontal plane. It also releases us from the illusory construct of Ego with its assumptions about the way things are internally and externally. Both Ego and the life dramas that reinforce it seem absolutely real to almost everyone, until one takes the time to really observe what is going on. All that is required for seeing how things truly are is an unwavering commitment to the truth and the willingness to accept the discipline of daily reflection. This is heart of meditation. Its ultimate and deepest purpose is to know and become one with what is. Nothing more. Nor could anyone ever hope for anything better.

Everything participates in being, which is God, who is in essence consciousness. This is not something I would care to try to prove syllogistically. It is rather the consensus of those who over the ages have experienced consciousness deeply. This level of experience is accomplished by being aware, by opening our minds as fully as possible, so that our experience of what is within us and around us might be as complete as possible.

Embodied awareness through our emotions and sensations is part of this. The more we give these things our attention, the richer and deeper they become. Paying attention brings enormous dividends. No one wants to look at a beautiful vista through smudged lenses or listen to music with clogged ears. Truly paying attention so that one can be genuinely present to the vibrant bounty of life is a special skill that must be practiced in order to be mastered. The practice of paying attention internally, through meditation, helps us learn to pay better attention externally and simultaneously opens the way to directly experiencing consciousness or God.

Just as there are many purposes for meditating, there are innumerable methods as well. The method I recommend for those who do not already have a meditation practice involves focusing on the breath. It takes no special skill and is available anytime and any place. Simply be aware of your breath entering and leaving your nostrils, or alternatively be aware of the rising and falling of your abdomen. Do nothing to modify or control the breath. Only be aware. Nothing more is required aside from a comfortably erect posture so that you do not fall asleep. This keeps attention grounded in the present moment. It also serves as a kind of home base so that when the mind wanders, as it will inevitably, it offers a place to return. Focusing on the breath gives the mind just enough to do to help it not become lost in distractions, daydreams, etc. which will be a major part of all, but the most adept meditator’s experience.

The good news is that the distractions, mind chatter, and preoccupations that emerge when we quiet ourselves in a meditation session are themselves a gift. First and most obviously they give us a glimpse into the background mental noise and themes that we are often unaware of, but which may play an important role in how we live our lives. I may have unacknowledged feelings or attitudes toward partner or job or any myriad of things that are affecting the quality of my life which I need to be aware of in order to take appropriate action. I may also be putting considerable emotional energy into not being aware of grief, guilt, shame, fear or anger which in the quiet of meditation may finally start to emerge and even move toward resolution through the meditative process.

The unwavering commitment to truth, which lies at the heart of any hope for a meaningful life, is the key for turning these distracting mental contents into transformative gifts. Even though the ultimate goal of meditation is a clear, undistorted connection to consciousness itself, pushing away or attempting to control these distractions will only lead to a more rigid Ego and make meditation a chore rather than a time of liberation. Truth demands that I allow myself to know without distortion what is within myself. This means that even though I may not like or want to admit that whatever mental content emerges is actually a part of me, I don’t resist or push it away. I don’t argue with it nor do I judge myself for it being there. I may be a committed loving husband who finds himself having sexual fantasies about a co-worker, or a pacifist dedicated to nonviolence who catches himself imagining revenge scenarios. Whatever the content, I admit to myself that it is there and a part of me. I refrain from judgment since everything within us has its reasons and our ultimate truth is the divine out of which we emerge. Consequently, there is no need to push it away or fight with it, nor is there any benefit from indulging it or identifying with it in the sense of deciding that this content is “who I really am.”

The same can be said for more positive distractions or mental contents. Celebrations of the self such as generous, kind or even heroic mental scenarios also define and limit us. Perhaps not as obviously or severely as the more negative or unkind imaginings, but nevertheless they reflect only a part of ourselves. When I identify with or cling to these. I reinforce an artificial self constructed according to an ego ideal. These images also need to be acknowledged as a part of ego and then released without judgment as I return my attention to my breathing. As I become more and more transparent to pure consciousness or God, I cannot predict whatever it is that I might evolve into. Nor can I control its manifestation. Any attempt to do so by imposing categories of right and wrong and thus choosing one and rejecting the other is merely another reiteration of who I think I am or ought to be. This attempt to create an imagined self is the antithesis of the ultimate goal of meditation, which is the direct experience of consciousness or God. Out of this experience will blossom whatever of me is most real and generative.

Aside from this ultimate liberation, meditation brings us many gifts along the way. The first and most obvious is that it gives us a break from the often-frenetic pace of our lives. I take comfort from the permission it gives me to just sit and do nothing, but experience my breathing and drink in some silence. My body settles. Stress levels drop. I feel refreshed afterwards. I am more alert, creative and flexible in response to challenges. A twenty to thirty minute session of meditation in the midst of demanding schedule is a delight that allows me to return to my tasks with more to give and with a better attitude as well. A short nap will accomplish much the same thing at the physical and emotional level, but it does not offer any of the other significant benefits meditation can bring.

A second, ancillary gift of meditation is that the way I have described for dealing with distractions is also an excellent way of being in life. In meditation you are encouraged not to judge your mental contents, neither cling to them nor push them away. The corollary of this is that by returning your attention to your breathing and ultimately to consciousness or God, the very best that you can be will emerge although it will inevitably be more and other than what you can imagine. This is also the best way to live our lives externally. First we must be willing to do our best to see things in the world as they really are. This can only be done effectively when we set aside our mental agendas, cease cheering for one side or the other and realize that whatever is happening in society is a reflection of the human nature that we all share. Even when we decide to do this, we need to know that there is a vast difference between what we perceive and what is. Just as in meditation we know that the ego our distractions reflects back to us is a mental invention that falls far short of the authentic self that only emerges spontaneously from the depth and has always been with us. Similarly, what we assume to be the world is a distorted and fragmentary approximation of the wondrous mystery that flows out of the same numinous being or consciousness in which our authentic selves are grounded and which meditation seeks to free.

This attitude, both in meditation practice and in life at large is sometimes called “choiceless awareness”. At first glance it appears to be passive and ineffectual. How can being aware without judgment make any constructive difference in life? Internally, in meditation, however, it makes a very big difference. As a therapist for many years I have consistently observed that apparently pathological contents when held without judgment, by a client, over time lose their potency. I have seen it in my clients and I have seen it happen in myself. Shame, anger, grief and all the rest fade when acknowledged with an open hand. Eventually, they will spontaneously devolve into their most basic constituents, which finally are different aspects of love for self, life, the body, the senses, etc. Attempts to block pathological contents rigidify and energizes them. What we resist, persists. Identifying with them also energizes them and drives them to more extreme levels.

The same process is operative socially. When I judge or categorize another whom I consider to be an adversary, I am likely to rigidify and energize whatever pattern it is that I find offensive. If I can approach the other without judgment simply wanting to be aware of what is true within that other an opening is created. My attitude of genuine willingness to know who the other is is very hard to resist and usually leads to self disclosure and connection. I am not liable to be able to do this with external adversaries until I have learned to practice it with the internal adversaries that emerge in meditation practice.

The healing power unleashed by choiceless awareness is almost self evident when you think about it, and a source of great encouragement. Neither I nor the world are dependent upon my plans and efforts in order for the fullest potential to come to fruition. Internally and externally there is a deep source that readily manifests itself when I take a receptive stance and forego the felt need to control. This is not to say that the control oriented mentality is itself wrong or bad. It is sometimes necessary for survival. But it should always be in the service of the open, receptive heart that is developed and exercised in meditation.

Many of the distracting contents of meditation and everyday life do not carry the same charge as those we feel compelled to cling to or push away. They are more like background noise. Internally they take the form of daydreams, inner dialogs, plans and memories. Externally they are usually composed of idle chatter, artificial environmental stimuli such TV, radio, Ipods, billboards etc., and the busyness of our lives. In meditation practice the daydreams and inner dialogs can absorb us for minutes at a time until we realize what is happening and return to our breathing. In outer life these kinds of distractions can engage our attention for hours at a time before we appreciate how disconnected we’ve become from our senses, emotions and selves. At which point we then have the opportunity to take a deep breath and reclaim the present moment with whatever real feelings and sensations are available to us.

Eventually, our awareness, which in the beginning of meditation practice was absorbed by the day dreams and dialogs will become less of a participant and more of an observer of the process. The contents will continue to arise, but they become more like leaves floating down a stream. Awareness is now sitting on the bank, no longer in the stream. Gently, it allows everything simply to pass by. At this point awareness begins to become free enough to begin merging with consciousness itself. This happens, not by fighting the distractions, but by allowing them to flow on and gently returning attention to the breath.

Even for the beginner there are brief moments of clarity in between the distractions. In those moments there is only awareness. When I appreciate that even as a beginner I can briefly touch pure awareness, I know then that it is a real possibility, which with time and patience can grow.

In the external world a parallel process can evolve. The more often a person takes a moment to be sensitive to body and feelings, the awareness of the body with its emotions and sensations will begin to become that person’s fundamental grounding perception. Out of this will come a dynamic integration into immediate life experience with the energy and delight of a truly vital life.

Meditation, as I understand it, is far from an escape from life. It is a path to embrace creation and its source as fully as possible. And it is so simple to do.

I recommend Stephen Levine’s book, “A Gradual Awakening”, for those who would wish to pursue these themes in greater depth.